What happened to social distancing?

Now is a good time to take a good, long look at yourself in the mirror if you haven’t already. Relax your focus and take five deep breaths. Allow your chest to rise and fall. But remember to come back. We can all relate to the feeling of yearning lingering between our days for the past few months. It’s hard to know exactly what we want for the moment. 

Perhaps we seek the comfort of another’s touch caressing us with the certainty of the future. Some of us get to be in close proximity with those who are a part of our emotional support system, whereas others are not. I’m not in that particular situation, and I find myself constantly mulling over many thoughts; some regarding more frequent pangs of loneliness, wondering how I can distract myself, and pondering over methods of how I can possibly shoot my shot at one of my crushes. 

Given the COVID-19 Crisis, many of these questions do not have simple answers. Restricting social functions is difficult and many still feel awkward in executing those procedures. I believe that increased discussion on the importance of self care will encourage more understanding as to how we can best respect each other’s space while assessing risk levels for COVID-19.

Our bodies are equipped to handle short-term danger and the stress response that our bodies produce because of it, but prolonged vigilance of danger can result in what is referred to as caution or crisis fatigue. When you are stressed, your body releases cortisol, the stress hormone, along with adrenaline. The combination of cortisol and adrenaline is literally the makeup of the flight or fight response. 

However, our bodies are not equipped to exist like this. When repeated threats to our ideas of comfort occur over longer periods of time, we are prone to shutting down. This generally tends to show itself through feelings of numbness and emotional or psychological displacement. In short, your emotional response is valid and is backed by science.

Humans are social creatures by nature. Whether one considers themself an introvert, an extrovert, or anywhere in between, the COVID-19 pandemic calls for restricted social functions, which are necessary yet inherently unnatural. I might even argue that restriction of social proximity is a factor that weighs heavily on the growing, omniscient aura of the dystopia of this current reality. It’s uncomfortable and the emotions we experience in response to it do not require a necessity to be understood right away. However, they absolutely should be addressed. 

Time isn’t going anywhere and it’s not giving us a deadline to come to a conclusion, to internalize whatever lesson you can make sense of and move on. As the days began to merge, many of us find ourselves still wading in these sour emotions and some are turning to treacherous avenues of escapism to find their way out of the water. 

We have all become witness to many people who have somewhat “let go.” Some of us see this in the general public but many of us are seeing it within our social circles as well. Many people are not scared to continue their routine of posting everything they do on their Snapchat or Instagram stories. Since restaurants and other amenities of social gathering have opened up again, people are giving into their vices of spending money in a desperate need to reclaim routine. This is an observation rather than a criticism. 

COVID-19 impacted ecommerce immensely, as people had no other option but to shop online for a few months. Purchasing items that will improve our lives or simply bring us joy can be therapeutic. However, as states began opening up prematurely in April, many people rushed to try and hold onto the comfort they once knew, ignoring the dangers. 

Having access to a facade of normalcy aided people in their ignorance. Especially due to the lack of advocacy for healthy emotional support, people are willing to exchange critical analysis of the governing factors of the nation’s current situation for convenience. People are willingly consuming a warped reality that in actuality, cannot suppress the severity and fear that surrounds a pandemic. I urge you all to read this article from CNN, highlighting some of the 91,000 lives lost in the United States since April 24; the date that the state of Georgia became the first state to open up. As the rest of the country began to open back up, we witnessed many classmates, coworkers, acquaintances and friends of all kinds rush to rekindle their patronly relationships with various establishments. 

I catch a glimpse of it all as I bike through the neighborhoods of my university, and I am strangely comforted by the parties— at least no one there is at risk against their own will. It is too easy for me to get angry by these acts of considerable selfishness, but I recognize the emotional complexity at the same time. While feelings of contemptment against these actions are valid, it is also worth looking into reasons why these actions are occurring. It’s worth dissecting the reality of caution/crisis fatigue and how its occurrence is inevitable when there isn’t enough self care and emotional reassurance during times of social chaos.

Caution or crisis fatigue is the reaction that occurs when people exhibit “low motivation or energy to comply with safety guidelines”. It hasn’t been that long since we were all in our homes essentially cowering in our new fears of one another. As time went on, Americans were met with the tension of social uprising. 

Both of these events have forced many to think about how they view their government and analyze how their government views them. This process is considerably tiring for all, but is traumatic for BIPOC as history (which is currently repeating itself) has shown time and time again the lack of concern and respect for their livelihoods. 

I’ve noticed crisis fatigue in myself is in the way I feel about going to the grocery store. While not nearly as high-risk as restaurants and bars, the grocery store is a considerable risk for COVID transmission. This awareness was definitely more prevalent back in March, but it was an awareness fueled by fear.

The grocery store is no longer an anxiety trip of darting glances and skittish dances of avoidance between the aisles because now we know what we’re doing. The discomfort has become normal, rationalized even by the way the chaos of life proceeded to accelerate at an unexpected rate. 

Protesting used to be normal for me. I am used to fighting for my livelihood in the same streets I went to grade school in. Sneaking out of my parents’ house to protest outside of the governor’s mansion for Philando Castile was how I spent my summer in 2016. I’ve also noticed crisis fatigue in the energy I possess while attending protests. Protests are no longer empowering emotional releases. They are traumatic.

I can feel the weight of literally fighting for my life while people are fighting against grocery store workers over their “rights” when it comes to wearing a mask. Perhaps I am just now old enough to address the trauma that these events carry, both within the catalyst period of time as well as the storm that follows. It was scary when I was 16, and it’s still scary now. But something about the nausea that comes as a side effect of protesting feels more aggressive. Maybe it’s the sickening summer heat...

The allure of ignoring the necessity of caution comes from the desire to be agents of our own happiness. This is a lesson that is taught to us from the start, and it has been encouraged that we must strive to be autonomous in creating happiness in our own lives. However, those ideas do not merge well with a pandemic with a severity that has never been seen by anyone alive right now. 

While older folks are most at risk of dying from coronavirus, young people have always been the ones most likely to spread it— despite the fickle details surrounding the severity and likelihood of young people being infected and/or dying. In Arizona, people under the age of 45 account for 61 percent of the state’s cases. As of July 15, California is working to reclose their restaurants and bars because people ages of 18 to 34 make up the highest percentage of new cases. 

If you have yet to return back to work on site, you most likely have an ample amount of time on your hands. Even if you have returned, many of us are working shorter hours than we were before. When I’m not working, writing, or keeping up with the events of Minneapolis, you can find me in the kitchen cooking a meal. Cooking has become one of my go-to methods of self care when I have the time. My skills have definitely improved in the past few months. Unfortunately, I never reached the bread making stage of quarantine (I still have time to though)!

As someone who thrives off of multitasking, cooking is the best way for me to watch TV shows or movies. Watching a show or a movie is a good way to practice self care on its own. However, if you’re like me and find yourself especially prone to distraction while stressed, I need to be physically engaged as well. By cooking, I am doing something to keep me physically distracted while I’ll consume whatever content of my choice, and then I have beautifully plated, filling, and healthy food! It’s the perfect combination and I am very lucky to have the space to practice this method of self care. A routine action has become a source of comfort for me. It soothes the pressures of isolation and keeps myself and others safe.

The link between consumerism and the concept of self care is a big factor in the ways that people are exhibiting their caution fatigue. Not only does going out and making an event out of spending money soothe the urge that was exacerbated by restriction, but it also pushes the idea that the notion of caring for yourself needs to be validated by spending money and often decent amounts of it. 

The capitalization of the term “treat yourself” is a good example of this. The phrase was popularized by the character Donna Meagle from the TV show, Parks and Recreation, and was subsequently used by brands to promote their products; encouraging consumers to indulge, give in, and “treat themselves” by buying their products. 

An aspect of treating yourself that should be popularized is the idea of creating things for yourself. This transcends the monetary expectation of the ideology and expands the necessity of self care by encouraging methods that can be more sustainable. My personal example of this would be practicing my instruments. I have been a musician since I was a child but did not have the means to pursue it in a more serious manner as I got older. 

I am someone who prefers to remain busy and I am very good at finding the means to be busy at almost all times. Because a lot of this time is spent focusing on things that are not necessarily for my immediate satisfaction such as community organizing, work, extracurriculars, and my education, I have pushed out a lot of time in my schedule that I would prefer to use dinking around with my instruments. At the beginning of quarantine, I developed a better habit of practicing my guitar. I admit it was easy to simply turn off my video and audio on Zoom during lectures and practice a few songs. 

Currently, my guitar is my quick break when I’m writing articles or editing interviews for my university’s radio station. However, when I am granted the time to actually put hours into practicing, it leads to relaxation. Often I get a good degree of introspection out of it too, leading to journaling—another method of self care that I’d recommend. If you don’t have access to physical instruments, learning how to use Garageband or other free music software is another way of relaxing in a creative manner. Software also encourages you to get creative with the inspiration that you can look up at your fingertips.

In efforts to take care of yourselves, the first step is addressing your own emotions. They are real and they are justified and you have the right to console them, but you do not have to do so in a way that puts others at risk. By engaging in risky behavior, you are deliberately centering yourself in an issue that is literally affecting the whole world. Seek comfort in spending time in the outdoors doing absolutely anything! The sun and fresh air will still shed their warmth onto you. 

Consider social distancing to be a measure of compassion for those you love and care about rather than something that has been imposed on you. While it is easy to isolate your existence from others by prioritizing your needs, isolation takes away from the reality of living in a society and makes you forget that it can feel good to care about other people.